Why am I writing these blogs? I want you all to know I am writing these
blogs…hell I am writing about my life…my life is not a blog! I am writing my inner most feelings because I
lost my only biological child. I lost my
husband. I lost my siblings. I lost my very best friend…twice. I lost my father…and truth is I never even
knew this man…and still his loss has an effect, although the conclusion of how
much his death has had on me is still not known. I am writing so you the
audience will know my life right now while I am still in the moment…and…hopefully
by walking in my shoes you can get a glimpse, albeit a very infinitesimal hint, of how it feels to be a prisoner of
this grief. I want the whole damn world
to know I mourn the people I love. I am
putting myself out there unafraid of all who will read me. I am writing without fear of the critics who
surround me and question my motives…you who no doubt, have come to your own
conclusions as to why you think I write.
I pour out my inner most feelings, thoughts, emotions on these pages not
for your pity…NOT FOR PITY…but hopefully to EDUCATE! I hope to show you the audience what it is
like for those of us who mourn. I urge you, dare you, to take this walk with
me…in my shoes…and share what you have learned.
If you have learned. I encourage,
no I implore you to send this blog to others so they too can absorb these words
and remember them when someone they love weeps.
Everything in life starts with a simple gesture…this is my
simple gesticulation. Don’t you get
it? I am trying to help you so you can
help the people you love. Death is all
around us. Perhaps losing Jeff has made
me mad enough to try to make something constructive out of the most
unimaginable loss known to man. Perhaps
it is the first anniversary of my son’s death that has burned a hole under my
feet to reach out to all you who read. Don’t
let Jeff’s death be in vain. Let me say
again…DEATH IS ALL AROUND US…I have told you of my loss. I haven’t even mentioned my loss within my
close circle of friends. They too are
grieving. They too need your help in their loss. I weep with them…just as you cry with
me. Please read every word of every
line…learn from my experience. Take
these words to heart and share them with others. Be brave enough to walk in my shoes without
criticizing my efforts. Be brave enough
to say aloud, “I want to help!” There
are those of you who follow actions of others…just this once…follow your
heart. If my words in any way have
tugged at the strings of your heart then please forward this blog so others can
also step in my shoes. Just once follow
your heart…Olgie
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